Resist the urge to fight...
My son and I love the beach, a day at the beach is always what I crave when my head is spinning and I need some fresh air to clear out all the funk! I love the beach but I am terrified of the ocean. I love to sit on the beach and watch the waves roll in and out. I have a deep respect for the power of the ocean.
Unlike his fearful mother, my son loves the ocean. When he was a little dude going to the beach was not relaxing for me. It freaked me out! I would sit on the beach so worried he was going to get taken down by the force of the waves. I made a decision to teach him to respect the ocean, either that or I was going to be a wreak every time we went to the beach. I love the beach way too much to let that happen.
So I did what every mom does to solve a problem. I went to the internet to learn how to talk to my son about the ocean current. What I learned was that when you get caught up in a current you do not try to fight it, you swim with it and keep your eye on the beach. On our next visit to the beach I watched my son lay in the waves and let himself get bounced around and beat up by the waves.... he loved every minute of it. He explained to me how each wave was different and would take him in different directions but he would always end up back on the beach. He did this for hours until it got cold and his lips where turning blue!
When my life took a big shift and the dark, strong waves of life kept knocking me down. I said to one of my friends... the waves just keep on coming..... I was feeling beat up, worn down and not sure I could pick myself up again. It hit me in that moment what I taught my son about the ocean. I could fight the current of change or I could ride the waves and see where it took me. I kept my eye on end result which was to feel good. I will tell you it was not easy to resist the fight. I wanted to fight, but when I fought... I got knocked on my ass! It takes courage to let go of the fight and needing to be in control. Letting go and floating across the top of the wave gave me an incredible feeling of freedom. I still got a little beat up but I always ended up in a better place than where I started. I still catch myself resisting the current and I usually end up right in the same place as I started. My mantra during challenging times is " let go and ride the wave" then I picture my son rolling around in the waves laughing and enjoying the ride.